Chapter 12

I took her to the trail through the tall grass, running along until she told me to stop. “We’re not running,” she said. “Let’s go slow and watch for signs.”

We walked along, parallel to the tall grass looking everywhere for any clue. I was clutching the Spiderman figure in my hand. Eventually we came to a small spring that ran between switchgrass lined banks down to the river. We went up the stream, climbing steadily for probably half a mile. We were in dense woods, but there was a path. There was a small steeper rise ahead, a clearing of sorts and the switchgrass had encroached into the meadow. As we came out of the woods, I gave a hoarse cry.

Tomy was lying in the grass and there, panting happily and asleep, with her head resting on his warm side, was Sareen. I ran to them and my head began to swim. I fell to my knees and gathered her tiny form in my arms. She stirred and woke, snuggling into my chest. Her eyes opened and that indigo blue peeked up at me.

They popped open when she saw my face. “What’s wrong, Daddy?” she asked.

I couldn’t speak. “Why are you crying, John?” she asked, touching my cheek and wiping away a tear.

“I thought I’d lost you, baby,” I croaked. “I couldn’t find you anywhere. I… oh God… I thought I’d lost you. I love you so much, Sareen, it would kill me if anything happened to you.”

I felt Sara’s hand on my shoulder. I looked up at her and tears were flowing down her cheeks.

“It’s okay, Daddy.” Sareen reclaimed my attention. “Me and Tomy were sploring and I got tired. We got a drink from that little water and we were just resting for a minute. You aren’t mad at me, are you?”

“No, baby, no,” I assured her. “I can never be mad at you. I’m mad at myself for not watching you better. I won’t ever do that again.”

“I was okay,” she told me. “Just a little tired. Can we eat our picnic now?”

“Of course,” I said. “Can your mother stay and eat with us?”

She was ecstatic for Sara to stay.

I called the sheriff’s department and they called off the search. No doubt, I’d be paying a hefty bill for this little fiasco. I didn’t care; I would give everything I had to get Sareen back safe and sound.

I carried Sareen back to our oak tree and she was asleep again by the time we got there. I sat down with my back against the tree, just holding her, never wanting to let her go. Sara sat on the blanket in front of me, those impossibly long legs crossed, giving me occasional glimpses of seafoam green panties. My thoughts were all over the place, mostly on what an ass I’d been, and that view wasn’t helping.

“John, are you okay?” Sara asked.

“You mean aside from feeling like an immature ass?”

“Yeah, aside from that,” she said, with one of those laughs of hers.

“Well…”

“Hungry,” interrupted the little bundle of love in my arms. We laughed, and the feasting began.

We cleaned up our picnic and went to Sara’s house. Together, we put our tired little angel to bed, delighting in her sleepy smiles. Sara poured us some coffee and we sat down to talk.

“Sara, I’ve got to say… well, I mean, I think I can tell you,” I heaved a sigh and went on, “You’ve done a great job raising Sareen. She’s just perfect, and you’ve obviously been a great Mom.”

Damn, I’d forgotten what Sara looked like when I said nice things to her. The glow on her face was so bright it made her hair look dim. That made it harder, but I had to go on.

“So why do you want me to be her daddy? You can’t take me in public without me acting like an immature asshole. You leave her with me and I get her lost in the woods. I love her to pieces, Sara, but I’m afraid I’ll…” I couldn’t finish. I hid my face in my hands as the tears came again.

I felt Sara’s hands on my wrists. I opened my eyes; she was kneeling in front of me. Her own eyes were wet.

“John, you are her daddy. You know it, I know it, and most of all, she knows it. I had to do a lot of growing up to be a Mom, but I did it. I had to: she was depending on me. Now it’s your turn. You’ll have some bad moments, like today. I did, too. But you’ll have something I didn’t have.”

“What?”

“I’ll be right here with you, as much as you let me, as long as you let me. I’ll help you, like your parents helped me. We’ll do it together.”

Our eyes met, and we both wanted the same thing, but there was something else we had to deal with first.

“Can I ask you something?”

She leaned her elbows on her knees, cupping her pointed little chin in her hands. “Shoot,” she said.

“Last Saturday, I had Sareen,” I began. “She wanted pizza for supper and I called in to The Cellar to get it.”

I saw the light go on in her eyes. “When we went to pick it up I saw you there with some guy. You were holding hands and it looked like you were pretty serious. Who is he, Sara?”

“An asshole,” she said. “His name is Jeff, Jeff Conley. He’s the station manager over at The Eagle. I went out with him for a while. He was much more serious than I was. I quit going out with him after I finally got you to talk to me that first time at the pool. He was pretty upset about that and I agreed to meet with him and tell him why it was over. He didn’t take it well.”

“He was holding both your hands, and it looked like you were about to kiss him from where we were standing,” I said. “Are you lying to me, Sara?”

Her eyes flashed dangerously. “What the hell is wrong with you, John?” she spat out. “No, I wasn’t going to kiss him.”

“Then why was he holding both your hands, if you were telling him it was over?”

She sighed. “I told him I would let him have his say. It wouldn’t change anything, and I thought he’d get it over with quicker if I let him hold my hands. I was telling him not to call me anymore. He’s been practically stalking me. Are you jealous? Well, you don’t need to be.”

“Are you still wearing the diamond he gave you?”