Chapter 141

A few moments passed and then something I didn’t expect- the feel of my mother’s arms around me, hugging me tight.

I held her as well and we said nothing for some time. I know how hard this was on her and now we were just trying to get through it, one way or another. Jeanie sat quietly and watched us until dad and Freja returned. Mom looked up at them.

“Anything?” she asked.

“Nothing terribly useful,” dad replied grimly as he sat on the chesterfield and mom joined him. “Just about everything is still here. Only things gone are her laptop and any personal identification, along with her phone. She left pretty much everything else, as far as I can tell.”

“I tried calling her, of course,” Freja added. “No response.”

“She must be hurting real bad if she’s cut you out too,” Jeanie said, caressing Freja’s cheek. “We can’t get her back if we can’t find her.”

“And there’s not even any guarantee she’ll come back anyway,” Freja sighed. “I’ve never seen her like this.”

“I think we’ve been sort of dancing around the obvious issue, too,” dad now stated. “Whether we like it or not, it’s the reason she left.”

I looked away, which my mother saw. “Alex, we’re not going to talk about this like you’re not here. It’s okay to speak.”

“I can’t, mom. I’m sorry.” I said quietly.

“Why, baby?”

I drew a deep breath. “Because I can’t talk about Alexa except… except as my wife. That’s the only context I have for you. Maybe it’s silly to you, maybe it’s absurd. But it’s the only frame of reference I can give you about any of this. And so I don’t really have anything to add.”

Mom and dad said nothing. Jeanie and Freja looked on quietly. Yes, they were involved, but this moment didn’t concern them.

“You got married, hm?” dad mused.

I nodded. “You guys had a kegger that night, you left us a note that we found after we got back from the glade. We had a rather pleasant honeymoon as a result.”

Mom grimaced. “Not on my bed, right?”

“No,” I said, trying not to chuckle while Jeanie snickered. “I promise.”

Mom sighed. “You already know it won’t stand up legally. This whole thing still overwhelms me in so many ways. The length of time it’s being going on, the scope of it…”

She looked at our guests. “Anything you two can add to shed some light on this can of worms?”

Freja made a wry face and looked at Jeanie. “Can of worms?” Jeanie shrugged helplessly. Mom might as well have said antidisestablishmentarianism. Nonetheless, they both contributed what they could to the narrative. Freja related many late-night Skype conversations with Alexa where she talked endlessly about Alex, to the place where Freja was convinced her friend was in love. Since avunculate marriage was legal in Denmark (if unusual), she didn’t care at all, as long as Alexa was happy. She just cautioned her about the implications here.

Jeanie was every bit as honest, if somewhat less insightful, for the most part. She mentioned her sex with Alexa and then teasing Alex with nude videos of her aunt, thinking she was being a silly pest by suggesting that Alexa and I having sex would be hot.

Then she walked in on us making love in our office and she was struck by exactly how beautiful and perfect we were together, that she was even jealous, sad because she’d never find a love that deep and meaningful. Freja bit her lip and hugged Jeanie while she spoke. The brunette continued.

“I… I guess I never really stopped to consider how much this could fuck things up for you two,” she murmured, looking at my parents. “I mean, you guys’ve been inside me, so I guess I just figured you were sorta untouchable, y’know?”

“Jeeeez…” I groused, putting my hands over my ears.

“A little late for that reaction from you, Mister Lannister,” mom said dryly. I didn’t know whether the return of her sarcasm was a good thing or a bad thing in these circumstances. Although I was happy that she’d stopped crying, at least for now. “Please continue, Jeanie.”

Jeanie considered her next words. “No word of a lie, I was so happy for them, I never really considered anything else except keeping their secret.”

“You’re a good friend, Jeanie,” mom said. “I’m sure Alex and Alli appreciated that.”

“Wish we hadn’t had to.” I sighed. “I don’t even know if ‘sorry’ is the right thing to say, mom.”

“I don’t know either, Alex,” she said wearily. “I don’t even know what to think. This has torn our family apart in one way, but if I’m practical, then I consider what might have happened if this thing between you two had gotten out at the university.”

I squirmed uncomfortably.

“Not everyone likes your father and I,” she explained. “There are lots of people who resent our influence over the departments. Something like this would give them a lot of slander material to work with. The university could reject that nonsense outright, but if a big enough stink was made, however undeserved, they could also decide it was just easier to let us go. And what legal action could we take, since the premise we’re fighting to keep our jobs on, an incestuous relationship, is illegal?”

I said nothing.

“Even if we won, there would be a cloud over us for a long time to come,” mom said quietly. “Alex, I’m not saying that your father’s and my careers take precedence over your happiness, but there are very serious considerations to be examined here. If this got out, forget the effect it would have on us, what would it do to you and Alli? If it was widely-known, who would hire you for jobs? You couldn’t even attend a church in peace.”

My face was in my hands. I couldn’t say anything. I just let her talk, I owed her that. To the most dreadful depths, of every aspect I’d ever avoided, I would let her take me there. Because it had to be faced, for all of our sakes.

“I mean, you could move out of the country,” she pointed out. “But I can’t imagine that suiting Alli, after nineteen years of desperately wanting to know her family. She just came home. She wants to be here.”

“It’s true, she does,” Freja agreed. “She wants to live here more than anything. It has always been her ambition, even when we first got to know one another. To come home, it was… everything to her.”

Mom stopped talking and wrestled with her tears again. Dad had an arm around her. I think it killed them both to do it, but they didn’t console me or put their arms around me, because I needed to feel this and face it alone, even if they were so nearby. In some ways, they might as well have been across the continent.

“I need a rest,” mom said finally, rising and holding a hand out for dad, which he willingly took. “Alex, we’ll talk again when I get up. Ladies, I’m so sorry we had to disrupt your honeymoon.”

“There is no honeymoon for us if Alexa and Alexa are in distress, Karen,” Freja said readily. “Or you and Michael. We’re your friends, and we will remain here until this has seen its end, whatever that is.”

Mom smiled and wiped her eye. “Please keep Alex company, then? See if you can figure something out?”

Both girls nodded and walked up and hugged her. Then mom came up and hugged me.

“I love you so much, Alex…” she said in a tiny voice.

Then they were gone. Freja and Jeanie took me to the chesterfield and sat me down cuddling me and whispering their condolences. There was nothing at all sexual about this, even if their hands were on me. We were all worried sick about Alexa.

“My parents will do what they can to see if she arrives in Denmark,” Freja assured me. “We will also try to determine if she returned to Cardiff, since that is where Miranda rests.”

Jeanie was trying not to cry, caressing my cheek and kissing it gently. She had little to offer except emotional support, which she gave the only way she knew how, with affection.

“I’ve never lost anyone important to me, Alex,” she murmured. “I mean, you know I was worried about being alone my whole life, but… to lose someone who was your everything… oh, God, Alex, I’m so sorry…”

She wept quietly on my shoulder while I caressed hers. Freja now knelt in front of me, between my legs, and gently lifted my chin, not at all bothered by my red eyes or worn expression.