Chapter 2

Aunt  Jessica  tilted her head, smirking at me across the table.
“A virgin, huh? You still are,  David ?”

I froze mid-sip, nearly choking on my drink. My cheeks burned instantly.

“ Jessica !” Mom snapped, giving her sister a sharp glare.

 “That’s inappropriate.”

Aunt just shrugged casually, her lips curling into a teasing grin. 

“What? I’m just gauging the situation.” She turned back to me, her elbow resting on the table, chin propped on her palm. 

“So, no flings… no girlfriend… Tell me, have you ever kissed a girl?”

I shifted uncomfortably in my seat, my fingers drumming against the glass in my hand. “…No, not really,” I muttered, wishing the ground would swallow me whole.

 “And honestly… that’s none of your business.”

It didn’t help that the only two women who had ever kissed me in my entire life were sitting right here — Mom, when I was a kid, and Aunt  Jessica  on birthdays or holidays.

Aunt raised her eyebrows.

 “What about asking a girl out? Flirting? Tried a cheesy pick-up line? Anything at all?”

I stared down at the table, silent.

She sighed and rubbed her temples.

 “Jeez,  David … you’re nineteen! A boy your age should know this stuff by now. I thought we raised you better.”

Mom frowned slightly, her voice softening.

 “His father should’ve taught him all that, but… well, it’s hard to do that when you’re not around.”

The room went quiet for a second.

“It’s not your fault,  Julie ,” Aunt said gently. Then she sighed, shaking her head with exaggerated defeat.

 “I guess that means… we’ve gotta teach him.”

I blinked. “Wait, what?”

Aunt grinned like she had just come up with the greatest idea ever.

Mom leaned back in her chair, thoughtful. “I mean… she might be right,” she said slowly.

 “We’ve taught him everything else over the years.”

“Exactly,” Aunt said, pointing at me like she was laying out a grand plan. 

“Starting conversations, flirting, kissing, touching, even… sex. The whole shebang.”

I groaned, sinking into my seat. “Oh, God… please, stop.”

“Aw, don’t be such a baby,” Aunt teased, clearly enjoying my embarrassment. 

“This could actually be fun.”

Fun. Right. The thought of flirting with Aunt  Jessica  — awkward as hell — wasn’t completely impossible, though. We’d always been close, we’d always joked around. But… anything beyond that? No. Thinking about her that way was already bad enough. Thinking about Mom? Nope. Absolutely mega cringe.

Still… I couldn’t deny it. Being a nineteen-year-old virgin sucked. Badly. At this point, almost any warm, willing human being would do. Almost.

Then Aunt clapped her hands together suddenly, her eyes lighting up.

 “Oh! I’ve got an idea. Role-play!”

I blinked at her. 

“Role-play…?”

“Yup!” she said cheerfully.

 “It’s a good teaching tool. So,  David … imagine you’re at a bar, trying to chat up a woman. Your mom here—” she jerked her thumb toward  Julie  “—is going to pretend she’s a stranger. You practice on her.”

I nearly choked. “What?! With Mom?”

“She’s hot enough for that,” Aunt teased with a wink.

Mom burst out laughing, covering her face with one hand. 

“God… I’m gonna need a drink for this. Or maybe two.” She got up from the table and headed for my little liquor cabinet in the corner.

“That’s the spirit!” Aunt said, clapping her hands once. 

“Make it authentic. Pour us some, too.”

Mom came back with three glasses, setting one down in front of me and one in front of Aunt  Jessica  before sitting back down with hers.

I sighed, staring at the glass, already dreading where this was going.

Aunt  Jessica  leaned forward, resting her elbows on the table and giving me a mischievous grin.
“Alright,  David . Imagine you’re at a bar, okay? You see this gorgeous girl sitting alone. Maybe she’s lonely. Maybe she’s waiting for someone to come talk to her. That someone is you. Go on — start chatting. And if you get stuck, look at me.”

I swallowed hard, my throat suddenly dry. Turning to Mom, who was pretending to be “the girl,” I tried to force the words out.

“Oh… hi. I’m  David ,” I stammered awkwardly. “How… uh… how are you this evening?”

Aunt  Jessica  sighed dramatically, rolling her eyes. “Oh my God… smooth as sandpaper,” she muttered under her breath. But she waved her hand at me. 

“Fine, fine, keep going.”

I glanced at Mom nervously, but she smiled encouragingly, playing along.

Aunt leaned back in her chair, watching me closely. “Alright, so… what do you think,  David ? Do you like her?”

I hesitated for a second before nodding. “…Yeah. I think so,” I said, though my voice was quieter than I intended. Like I could really say anything else with Mom sitting there.

“Good.” Aunt’s smirk widened. 

“Then flirt with her. Tell her what you like about her — her hair, her eyes, her smile, her laugh… her ass…her tits. whatever it is.”

I swallowed again, heat rising in my face. 

“Uh… what about… her tits?” I blurted out before I could stop myself.

Aunt chuckled and leaned forward on her elbows. 

“Go ahead and tell her. You don’t have to be shy. We’re just practicing.”

“Okay…” I said hesitantly, turning to Mom. “I… I like her tits.”

Aunt groaned and dragged her hand down her face. “Tell HER that, you dimwit!” she snapped, smirking at the same time.

I immediately winced. “Right, sorry.” I turned back to Mom, cheeks burning. 

“You… uh… you have nice tits,” I managed to say, blushing furiously.

For a second, Mom blinked at me — and then she smiled softly, almost amused. “Oh, thank you,” she said warmly, her voice teasing just a little. 

“That’s very sweet of you,  David .”

I wanted to sink into the floor.

Aunt turned to Mom with raised eyebrows. 

“Well? How’d that feel? Did you like it when he said that?”

Mom chuckled softly, hiding part of her smile behind her glass. 

“Yeah… I did,” she admitted, her tone playful. “It felt… surprisingly authentic.”

Aunt grinned like a coach whose player finally scored a point.

 “See? You’re not a complete lost cause after all. Now… let’s kick it up a notch.”

My stomach dropped. “Wait… what do you mean?”

“Next,” Aunt said, clapping her hands together, “you’re going to make a move. Tell her you want to kiss her.”

My eyes widened instantly. “What?! I— I can’t—”

“Yes, you can,” she interrupted firmly, leaning closer. 

“Come on,  David . It’s just practice.”